Portray to People

26th September

After a solid first half performance the rugby team began to fade and we dragged ourselves off the pitch shattered, disappointed and embarrassed by the final score line. There’s a reason why the rugby teams at my school are so united - we’re united through defeat rather than victory. It’s easy to turn around and start blaming your team mates but that’s never happened at my school.
“It must be shit to play for them” said one spectator. Strangely it isn’t. Not really.
Even though we go into almost every game knowing that the chances are stacked against us we continue to seek improvement and want each other to do well. The key to our regularly downfalls is confidence and when we lose again we have a choice of how to respond.
I learnt that often one of two options left is to take positives out of a difficult situation. This applies to the batterings taken by my team but also to much more. The other is to feign interest in the match and concentrate more on what you’re doing after it ends than marking your opposite number. The latter is the easier option but the former, although far more difficult and slightly annoying, is more beneficial. Hardly a revelation but important to remember nonetheless.

For the evening I was extremely tired from having such an early start, a rugby match and barely any sleep the night before.
At my friend’s house I lounged around, falling asleep and just generally lacking energy. I learnt a bit about the image I portray to people. Apparently when I’m tired and quieter people think something is bothering me. I never realised that it was so noticeable when I wasn’t at 100%. I got home too tired to write an entry and slept like a really tired log.

27th September

I spent the afternoon with a friend who lives round the corner from me. We just sat out on my balcony for ages enjoying the sun. Unfortunately she is naturally tanned and I am painfully pale. In fact, I’m so pale that I’m like one of those fish where you can see their organs.
Aside from emitting my white glow it was a really nice way to spend an afternoon. I learnt that it’s unnecessary to hesitate about arranging to see somebody just because you haven’t seen in them for ages. I if you think ‘I’d quite like to see…’ then you should get hold of them right then.